they need to just BURY HIM!
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
