i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
