i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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