yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
