you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
