So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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