yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
