is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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