Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize