with your own penis?
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
