can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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