yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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