My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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