Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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