ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
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My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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