My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
