I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.â€
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