420 ftw
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
