U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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