Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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