I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
