I smell stomach acid.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Randomize
