how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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