Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize