Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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