I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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