All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
