508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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