You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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