My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
