hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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