i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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