Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
