Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i would one night stand the shit outta him
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize