I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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