with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
