i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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