just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
