Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
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I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
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May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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