i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
