If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
