well most of my day revolves around power hour
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize