The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize