we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Randomize
