Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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