Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize