Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
