Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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