are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
