is your mom at the bar?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Are we still banned from the library?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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