ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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