He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.